No matter who is doing the breaking up, break ups are hard (like really hard). And the tough parts don’t end after the official break up conversation happens. It lingers, it follows us around. It is near impossible to break up with someone and not have them cross your mind again (downfall to memories is they don’t leave your brain when the person physically leaves your life). It could be as simple as seeing or hearing things that remind you of your ex-partner for just a brief moment. Hard skill to learn, but a must do after a break up is to learn the appropriate coping skills to use to not allow those reminders of your ex derail your day.
It is impossible to not notice the actions of others around you (friends, family, coworkers, acquaintances, strangers online…) and it makes it highly difficult to separate those actions from yourself when those behaviors trigger you. I mean I even get annoyed of people’s behaviors that I don’t even know! Just seeing certain things online or hearing about a friend’s friend I cringe over certain actions and so desperately want to get ahold of their lives and whip them into shape!
Your palms get sweaty, you feel that lump in your throat, you know you need to say something, but it just never feels like the right time. You don’t know where to start, but you know if you could just get that first word out it would all be better, but you just can’t. So, you hold it in, and you hold it in and then you hold it in a little bit more, until you can’t. And then you lose your shit and explode like no other either at that individual, or at someone totally uninvolved like the lady at Kroger who isn’t scanning your groceries fast enough.