how society is hurting men…
Many boys learned at a young age that they were not supposed to express vulnerable emotions. As a child when you hurt yourself or were feeling intense emotions, you were told to “rub some dirt on it”, “stop acting like a girl”, or “act like a man”. You were expected to “walk it off” or “suck it up” when you were hurt.
Perhaps throughout your childhood you became so good at hiding your emotional responses that by the time you became an adult you were entirely unaware of your emotions and how to express them.
how emotional suppression shows up in your day to day life…
Having trouble feeling any positive emotions
Engaging in high-risk activities
Persistent headaches, digestive issues, or physical pain
Thoughts or behaviors that interfere with your work, family, or social life
Unusual thoughts or behaviors that are concerning to other people
Anger, irritability or aggressiveness
Noticeable changes in mood, energy level, or appetite
Difficulty getting to sleep or sleeping too much
Difficulty concentrating, feeling restless, or on edge
Increased worry or feeling constantly stressed
Increased substance use
Sadness or hopelessness
How you can help yourself…
Take care of yourself. Go for a walk, run, workout, coffee break, go see your favorite band or comedian, make plans with your friends or hang out with your family. Surround yourself with the things and people that you love.
But when your normal, go-to skills don’t work and you just can’t shake it, it could be a sign that you need professional assistance. Are you feeling stuck? Continue to see the same negative patterns play out in your life? If so, it’s time to take control of your future.
Despite men being natural problem-solvers, sometimes your issues will be too complex to solve all on your own. You are not alone in your struggles. Remember that it is normal to seek assistance from a professional in times of need.
HOW I CAN HELP…
In counseling with me, we will work together to build up your emotional and relational intelligence as well as get you to a space where you feel more confident in your personal and professional decisions. I am here to challenge the viewpoint that in order to be a “real man” you have to hide your emotions, be a “warrior”, handle it alone, and struggle forever.
Throughout the counseling process I will help you will find immense physical and emotional relief when you realize that the thoughts and feelings you have been keeping to yourself all these years are normal. You will see that these changes will lead to a happier and healthier life.
You are not alone.